Being a pumpkin in October, is like being a turkey in November. As the old saying goes, “You can roll but you can’t hide.”
No matter how well you lose yourself inside the corn maze, squiggle into a crate of apples, or disguise yourself as large carrot, one of minis will eventually jump up and down squealing: “This one. This one” pointing at you. They always find you, those horrors of October, the vegan zombies.
They take you home, all the while talking about ancient vegan zombie rituals. Then is up on the kitchen torture counter where all the tools have been ceremonially arranged next to sheets of newspaper: the big knife; the smaller surgical knives; and the “scooper.”
Vegan zombie minis do a sacred dance along the elevated dais chanting repeated war-call-and-respond: “My turn. No, my turn. Mmoomm.”
Then, they send their children (disguised so the neighbors won’t recognize them) to beg for food.
The decorative pumpkins who remain whole, think they have escaped the “Vegan Zombie season,”until they are kicked to the curb along with all the leaves off the lawn. Then, their horrors really begin. A pumpkin-opath drives thru neighborhoods, looking for these easy targets for his pies!
Written for a trick or treat edition of Sunday Photo Fiction . Al has his “Halloween on! I hope I have not offended vegans, zombies, and vegan zombies!